Hi there! I’m Elsabe.
I want to ask you something …
You know that thing where you’ve had a fight with someone or a nasty conversation, or when you wrote an email or text? Then, a few hours later it comes to you: ‘I should have said …’! And now it’s going to bother you for the next ten years, damn. Or you have already posted something “funny” (in your opinion, anyway) on your social media and now it’s kicking in: “O_my_gosh. What was I thinking?” Every example here underlines one thing: good communication.
Yup. You know it.
Have you ever thought about the only thing that makes us different than animals? It is the fact that we can speak and write. The gift of communication is truly wonderful. There are some born communicators out there, who were supposed to be only communicators. But while we cannot all be a Trevor Noah, almost every person can improve their communication. We can talk more clearly, become better writers of texts, and get hundreds of likes for a good post (if you want it).
Why must you improve your communication? Well, that’s a great question!
If you want to get a job, ANY job, and preferably a kick-ass one, communication is the only thing you’ve got. When you are in a relationship that sucks, you can make it way better with some good conversations. Or maybe you already have the right job, but now you need to do presentations and documents and other scary stuff. Improve your communication! You want to win at debate, the only formula is great communication. Aha, you want people to love you, you know what needs to happen. You’d like more likes? Trust me, good communication gets you there.
Don’t you agree that wars and divorces and conflict could have been avoided if only the people could better explain themselves to each other? And this is the thing – humans cannot NOT communicate. Even if you refuse to talk or avoid me or are angry at me, your body and face and silence still say a very great deal. So while you are communicating, whether you want to or not, you can just as well try and get great at it.
What you tell yourself about yourself, is usually what you become. That is internal communication. I am not an airy-fairy guru who believes in positive thinking. But I believe and know good communication is the only thing that guarantees happiness and success. And we can all learn to do that.
Fact, is: good communication is not easy. Whether we speak or write or send signs, it is tough.
Good communication means great writing too
Written messages are just another form of communication. This explains why we love specific authors, magazines, reporters and newspapers more than others – because their written message speaks of clear, vivid and respectful communication.
When our relationships or friendships or work situations suck, it could be because we are choosing the wrong words. It can also be because we are not listening well. We send the wrong signals with our nonverbal communication (body language). We are pressed for time and send sloppy and rude emails and texts.
So what do good communicators get from other people? For one thing, they get respect. And other people believe them. O yes, is is already enjoyable to be with a good communicator, because there is just something more exciting about a conversation than with a person who does not do too well with communication.
Nobody communicates perfectly, but many people communicate well. And in case you are thinking that some people are just born with it and others will never be able to communicate, that is not true at all. We can all improve our communication skills and practice to do it (benefits of improved communication). It is true that there are people who were born as outstanding communicators (thinking Obama and Oprah here?), while others cannot for the life of them deliver a speech or have a happy conversation. But we can all learn how to do better communication.
I am a student of good communication for life.
Let’s communicate! And heal the world, one conversation and one good message at a time.